I Go to Seek a Great Perhaps
A world traveler once said that she wished she had kept better record prior to setting off on her grand adventure--the trepidation, planning, preparation. I wished she would have too because I’m sure it would be a really validating read for me right now! I think I have covered the whole spectrum of emotion over this past 8 or so months. And to what end, you are wondering?
I am moving. Far. Away. Like really far. Like the cost of plane tickets make you cry to look at it far. Literally selling 98.2% of my worldly possessions, fostering my beloved meows, and traveling the world—starting-ish with a sojourn in New Zealand. Now I have done some fairly extensive traveling by most people's standards but travel has always been dictated school schedule and/or PTO time. This is the first real plunge into something long term.
It’s funny... I have a hard time typing this right now and sharing my plans as they currently stand. Because...what if I change my mind (been there done that already)? What if I get scared (too late—ah!)? What if I break my arm (check)? Or what if, you know...Ryan Gosling comes up to me and says “Hey girl, you know, I love cats and I love you. What do you say we build the tiny house of our dreams and grow old together? (not happened yet but a girl can dream! Could anyone truly forego Goslinghood?!). But let’s be honest, I’d just strap him to my pack and bring him along.
The biggest hinderance to this whole thing is that I am afraid of failing. Which is crazy because how can you really fail at something that promises to be pretty spectacular no matter what?
It's weird to let go of my belongings and my house. It doesn’t feel like that long ago I gave myself permission to decorate and really make my space my own. It’s bittersweet to say goodbye. A few months ago I cleared out a ton of stuff after reading the Life-Changing Magic of Tidying (If you haven't read it, you must read it!). I was fairly obsessed. Possessions can weigh so much on us. I feel such a relief to be free of things I’ve lugged around for years. But seeing the last vestiges of my home leave piece by piece is surreal. My mom is not a fan. She said she misses the old packrat Tiffany—can we hold a moment of silence for that? I NEVER thought those words would come out of mother dearest!
I’ve got a few months before departure, more details and some microadventures to come. And plans might completely morph by then, but in the mean time, you’re welcome to come along for the ride:)
Goodbye house! Hello world!